Now how can you not read a tale that starts out that way? I will have to leave Albert Lea now to Northwood for a while, but it really could have happened anywhere. Albert Lea, Northwood or Racine Wisconsin. It was the same all over. Kids pushing up stream in a downstream world. So sit back and try to remember 1958, and another memory.

Rod wasn't the coolest guy I ever knew, but he was close. Rod was the most unique though. He wore unusual clothes. Not that they were different than any one else's, just that he wore these strange combinations. Rod would put on a Tee shirt that he had died purple, a yellow short sleeved shirt and over that a nice plaid long sleeved shirt. Now you can say any thing you like. But Rod thought it was neat. He wore dress pants a lot back then. I guess they looked better than wearing jeans with his getup. I guess he was like Elvis, he had to be a little different.

His hair was his trademark. I bet he had more hair in the summer of 58 than any wild heavy metal Rocker I ever saw. But Rod slicked all that hair down with an oil he bought at the dime store. It wasn't Brylcream it was just some rose oil he used. It made his hair real slick. He would comb it all straight back, then start pushing waves forward until it all piled up on his head. Once he got it there Rod was cool.

Now me on the other hand, I was into Jeans, a Tee shirt, a Jean Jacket and old beat up Cycle Boots. My hair not as long as Rod's but I did manage to have a Duck Tail.

We're off. Rod and I and of course Rod's "Sex Machine". A green 1949 two door Custom Hardtop Ford. You know Rod didn't like to have just a plain old 49 Ford. Rod liked tail lights. Every time he got paid he would add a couple of tail lights. When I knew him there were 47. Not one a reflector or the same design. They sure lit up though when Rod would fire that Ford up.

I suppose that's why I liked Rod and he liked me. We both didn't care what you thought. We were cool and that was that. The summer of "58" was meant to have fun and we sure did. A lot of the time was spent down in "The Park". You know the one that had those big cement steps that led down from Main street. We could kill a whole afternoon just laying down under a tree talking about what we were going do when we got rich and moved out there. We would pick long blades of grass, place it between our thumbs and blow on them . This was making "music". One sound would be lower than the other and we would go in turns so we called it "Green Grass Music". Then we would laugh. You see the only other way we would have any music down there was if Rod's little sister Judy would come down with her transistor radio. I bet we went through a couple dozen batteries that summer.

Radio ! ! !... 1958 ! ! !.... Northwood Iowa ! ! !... It wasn't K.O.M.A. that's for sure. It was mostly Party Line and the Farm Report. Even those farm reports were fun though . You would here some fella say Angus Heifers are up 2 and 3/8 while bulls were down 1 to 1 and 1/2. Rod would then stand up, stick out his belly, hold it with both hands and say. Now if we could only sell Miss Peterson (who worked in the school office). We could get rich and buy beer too. You see you don't measure Miss Peterson by the pound you measured her by the ton. This would get everyone laughing. We would probably spend the rest of the afternoon trying to outdo the other with some dumb jokes we had heard.

Getting back to Judy and her radio. I am sure she always brought her radio with her so Rod and I would stay and listen. You see, Judy had a crush on me. She was barely 13, and I was this older 15 year old. Judy was really quite pretty and was built like all 13 year old girls are built. ....They aren't..... And WHEN she did have a figure, it had to have been from toilet paper or rolled up socks. The first thing Judy would do after she got the radio tuned and hung in the tree, was plop down on my stomach and place a great big smack right on my lips. Most 13 year old girls usually kissed like they were kissing a sour grape. Judy though, she was a kisser. So when she came down to the park, I didn't exactly run away. Now Rod did not really like my kissing his 13 year old sister but so long as he was around, he knew I would behave. If my hands were to disappear for one second, he would be on us like a cat. So we just didn't do much more than necking ut what are you going to do in the middle of the afternoon in the park with people all around? I bet when she grew up and started really dating, she would be some boys thrill he would never forget.

I have spent a lot of time here introducing you to some of the players in this story. This was to let you know that we were not bad kids, we just liked to have fun and enjoyed being with each other. There is still a couple more that you will meet in a short while, but for now I will continue to paint the picture.

It must be about 6:00 PM now. Preparing to go out is just as important as the going out. Rod would give me a ride out to my place. (3 miles west of Northwood). I would get on a new tee shirt and get out of my Boots. A shower, some stickup and a dab Of Brylcreem and we were off to his place. We seldom ate....Eat?? We had plenty of smokes though. I worked at Fallgaters Grocery as a stock boy. Not the new fancy Fallgaters, but the old one on the corner up town. I could buy anything at cost and the checkout lady was a friend. That is why I was in charge of smokes. Rod had learned to smoke Winstons (I think to keep his girl friend happy and in smokes) But I was a Lucky's man (Yeh, I bet there's a story in there some where). With smokes on the dash and a six pack of Grain Belt for Rod in the trunk. (Rod was tight with his beer) and a six pack of Pop for the rest of us. Rod now had to get ready. It took longer for Rod to get ready you remember, with all that hair and all those shirts to change. Even dates were a dress up for Rod. He may even put a sweater over all those shirts.

Finally into the Ford. Oh did I tell you that Rodney and I could change out a stick shift in a '49 Ford in 15 minutes. If he were dragging someone with that Ford and really trying to win, you had to hit second gear without a miss. Half the time Rod would miss second, then we could hear the gears stripping. We would have to drive back into town in third. We always were climbing around in junk yards looking for Ford transmissions. We also made sure we got a couple at a time. We needed a spare in the yard just in case. He had ramps all set up and he would drive up the ramps, set the brake and we would have that "tranny" changed in no time flat.

Now a night out dating with me and Rod was sort of a ritual. He got to go out with Ruth and I got whatever girlfriend was staying over night with Ruth. All these girls were from Manly, Iowa. A small town just South of Northwood. Most of the time this wasn't all that bad. Ruth was a very typical 16 year old girl in 1958. She wore big hoop skirts and tight sweaters but absolutely DID NOT DO IT. Not that Roger didn't try. Sometimes it would get so steamy in that Ford, you would lose two pounds just double dating with him. Ruth's girlfriends ranged from pure angels to muttin faced lumps of potatoes. But we had an agreement and I always kept my part.

One of these girls was Connie. Now Connie was a long legged, good looking girl of 15. She had a great smile and an even greater personality. We always had a lot of fun with Connie around as she loved to make jokes and there was a mischievous side to her. There are a couple of things about Connie you should know though. Connie had a reputation and for such a sweet girl, the rumor was she was easy. ohhhh Darnnnn!!!...Also Connie had a nickname. "Toilet Plunger Connie". It was when Connie first Kissed me that I experienced the most frightening time of my young life. Connie could get your mouth, your chin and both ear lobes inside her mouth and at the same time shove her tongue half way down your throat. but all you had to do was gaze about 10 inches below her face and you would understand why a 15 year old boy would put up with almost anything. I guess I would just grin and grin and grin and bear it. We could create our own fog on the back windows of that '49 ford.

Now that you have two parts to the story you are wandering what the heck would corn stalk rash have to do with any of this. I will have to first explain where we always went to Neck. If you go about a mile or two north of Manly there is a creek that runs under the highway. Along side this creek is a dirt rut that some may call a road, The only other idiots on that path before us would have been the settlers. It was rough and full of weeds and trees and brush. Turns that if not taken right could dump you right in the creek. The trick was to back into this rut path while its still daylight. This served two purposes. One is that when it came time to leave you had headlights to see with. The second was that the Local constable would never come back in there for fear of never coming back out, or just plain laziness. There didn't seem to be many that knew about this place so we generally had the place to our selves.

Well one night Rod was really trying to get someplace with Ruth and he got frustrated and told me and Connie ( you thought I would call her something else tsk tsk tsk). to get the hell out of the car. There was not a lot of choices even though we did a grab a blanket from out of the trunk. it was either the weeds, the creek or a corn field.

Is the cat already out of the bag. Well as you can imagine how did I explain to my friends about getting "Corn Stalk Rash" under my shorts at 12:00 midnight all by myself. I must have said something dumb because even Judy didn't buy any of my excuses. I bet we didn't get to hear that radio for at least a week.

All I can say is That was quite a night getting "Corn Stalk Rash" from a "Toilet Plunger" in a "49 Ford" with 47 tail lights.

I hope you enjoyed this side track from Albert Lea and I hope you will join me again later when a another story, will take us back to the 50's